A small team of three (3) to five (5) strong mercenaries who are able to defend a humble Steamwheedle, NOT HORDE thank you, goblin researcher such as myself from grells, night elves, large cats, and anything else we may run into.
I'm a grell researcher. They bite. I need someone to hit them before they bite me and maybe help gather, move, and otherwise interact with samples I may wish to collect.
Contract does not include: hazard pay, wage negotiations, emotional support for any trauma received during research, friendship, dental or medical benefits, and other unlisted benefits. Please bring three (3) to five (5) copies of the attached contract, signed by each member of the party in ink, or else contract is null and payment will not be processed.
If interested, meet me south of Fel Rock in Teldrassil on April the 4th at 6 in the evening.
- Researcher Fizzit
<Attached are five (5) copies of the aforementioned contract. The lettering starts out average but quickly grows smaller.>
I, the undersigned, hereafter referred to as 'the second party,' do solemnly swear and agree to the terms set forth by Researcher Fizzit, hereafter referred to as 'Fizzit,' in reference to the mercenary contract provided in these pages, here after referred to as 'the gig.'
These terms include the observation of grell habitat, clothing (or absence), culture (or absence), language, behavior, magical use, social interactions, and physical appearance and any extermination, elimination, assassination, or murder of hostile grells that may interfere with Fizzit's research.
<It's now only readable under a magnifying glass.>
Fizzit does not guarantee physical, metal, emotional, psychic, or other forms of safety. No medical care will be provided by Fizzit under any circumstances. Medical care is required to be provided to Fizzit under all circumstances.
Due to personal discomfort with their abilities and tendencies, Fizzit requests that no (0) warlocks or demon hunters be in attendance. The presence of either will render this contract null and no (0) reward will be given.
In exchange, Fizzit will provide the party with a gold reward of...
<The lettering is so small that it's unreadable.>
((Five max, this is planned to be a small event and also part of a little series. Posting your name here will assume signing of the contract.))
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